How to Increase Self-Esteem When Readers Struggle
Posted on March 18, 2013 by Laura Pizzirusso in Literacy, Personal Experiences.
Tags: Literacy, self-esteem, struggling readers
If you are a parent of a struggling reader, you will see determination lead to tears. Helping you child read one word, when the next one stumps him just as much as the first, is an exercise in patience and endurance. You find that helping read the words won’t help him learn the skill to read. As a mom who could once make things better with encouragement, there is no bandage for children who are frustrated with reading. They know that they are not on grade level reading. They see their friends take home chapter books, and they are still reading short books. They hear their peers read aloud and know that they themselves hesitate, correct, and struggle much more than playmates at recess.
Frustrated with my son’s own frustration, I called a clinic meeting with his teachers to explain that what once was a good time to cuddle and read is now a battlefield, ending in tears. We came up with plan to use easier-to-read books that resemble chapter books, so he feels like he is progressing faster than he is. We also figured out how to reinforce his strengths and give his lots of praise and opportunities for the things that he does well: anything with numbers. Yet, with these steps, his is reluctant to attend school and has cried that he doesn’t want to go because of reading. He is too young to be asking to stay home, pretending that he is sick and counting down the days until weekend or vacation. According to an article by Imagine This!, struggling readers often can be characterized by “might start acting out in class or responding with negative feedback. They often use self-defeating phrases.” I see that we are there – and this list of pointers to “turning their negative thoughts into positive ones” is going to come in handy.
Imagine This! provides ten ways to increase your struggling reader’s self-esteem:
- Explain that how well she reads has nothing to do with her intelligence. Every person is unique and has to learn in the way that is best for them.
- Encourage him by setting realistic goals that allow for many small successes.
- Chart her progress so that she can see improvement.
- Help him find reading materials at his reading level that are interesting to him.
- Help her break up assignments into smaller, more manageable parts.
- Provide goal-based praise rather than person-oriented praise, such as, “You did a great job sounding out those words” rather than, “I’m proud of you.” This will help him focus on the task he accomplished well.
- Show patience. How you react to her reading difficulties will set the tone of the experience. Your patience will help her learn patience with herself and will help her feel safe as she practices reading.
- Give frequent praise. Learning to read is difficult and can easily turn into a stressful experience. Your praise will help create a positive reading experience.
- Help her focus on the positive. Have her list 10 things she likes about herself, including things she can do well.
- Tailor instruction to his learning style. Some students are visual learners, some are auditory learners, and some are hands-on learners. By teaching with a variety of learning styles, you provide opportunities for him to succeed in his area of learning.
The more confident I am in his abilities, makes him more confident in himself. We’re getting there.


